


The Tower

by Gang_of_Shadow



Category: Fire Emblem: Fuukasetsugetsu | Fire Emblem: Three Houses
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Angst, Angst and Porn, Aphrodisiacs, Azure Moon Spoilers, Drug-Induced Sex, Dubious Consent, Enthusiastic Consent, F/M, Fluff and Angst, Fluff and Smut, Fuck Or Die, Idiots in Love, Marathon Sex, Mild canon divergence, Multiple Orgasms, Mutual Pining, Oral Sex, Outdoor Sex, Pining, Plot What Plot/Porn Without Plot, Porn, Porn with Feelings, Post-Time Skip, Rough Sex, Sex, Vaginal Sex, Wake-Up Sex
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-12-05
Updated: 2020-12-15
Packaged: 2021-03-10 04:28:28
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 15,702
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27888304
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Gang_of_Shadow/pseuds/Gang_of_Shadow
Summary: When Byleth is recovered from an Empire dungeon her allies discover what new depths of depravity the Empire has sunken to.There's only one way to cure what's been done to her...___Inspired by https://twitter.com/DimilethFever prompts (I'm just too impatient to wait until spring XD)
Relationships: Dimitri Alexandre Blaiddyd & My Unit | Byleth, Dimitri Alexandre Blaiddyd/My Unit | Byleth
Comments: 51
Kudos: 238
Collections: Dimileth Spring Fever





	1. The Tower - Reversed

**Author's Note:**

> I couldn't wait until next year so I'm posting now. I'll just have to come up with something else for Spring Fever. ^_^  
> Dimileth Spring Fever: https://twitter.com/DimilethFever
> 
> This was supposed to be shorter, but then I was like "what if I whump them just a little, as a treat"... so now it's got 2 chapters.

Illness, Losses, Obstacles, Volatile Situation

* * *

"There has to be someone else," Dimitri bit out through his teeth.

"There isn't. Trust me, it wasn't as though there was a shortage of volunteers," Felix snarled back. He looked furious, disgusted.

"She's broken an arm, a collar bone, and fractured several bones in several people’s hands so far. Not sure if she's always been this strong, or if it's something the spores are doing…" Sylvain sighed.

"I'm surprised _you're_ still in one peace." Felix taunted.

Sylvain looked legitimately offended. "I know what my reputation is, but that’s not how I operate. It wouldn't be right…"

"And yet you ask me to do what you would not? Enough of this." Dimitri spun on his heel and made to leave. But Felix called after him, his voice uncharacteristically raised as he shouted to him.

"It _HAS_ to be you, Dimitri, your crest is the only one that can match hers. If you don't, she'll die. Whatever they did - they exposed her to the spores for far too long. Manuela said this is the only way for it to be worked out of her system." The swordsman looked away as if the mere thought of it was making him ill. "You're the only one that would survive being in the same room as her for more than five minutes."

"No one else knows besides Manuela, Seteth, and a few of the knights that helped us recover her. And Manuela said she'll probably forget all or most of it, it's like she's drugged right now. She's literally not herself." Sylvain paused before adding, "We've sworn everyone involved to secrecy."

He knew how he'd answer before he spoke, but he took his time before speaking. There was nothing he wouldn't do for her, even now, even _this_. But it sickened him as much, if not more than it clearly sickened his companions. "Very well, take me to her." Nothing else was said, Sylvain and Felix simply nodded grimly and led the way to the stables.

They rode out a few miles from Garreg Mach, to a secluded area well away from any of the main roads, or any settlements or bastions of civilization. Their destination was an abandoned watchtower. There were two guards standing at its base, watching the entrance. The tower had only one way in or out, and the windows were small and narrow - meant for loosing arrows, not viewing the landscape.

The guards let the three of them pass silently, barley making eye contact. Felix and Sylvain brought him all the way to the top floor where a large oaken door, locked from the outside, stood between them and their former professor.

"She's not herself," Sylvain reiterated nervously.

"As you said."

"And she might not ' _know'_ you so to speak," he continued. "So just be…"

Felix scoffed as Sylvain floundered. "He's trying to say that you should try not be the boar we all know you are for once in your life. This isn't the time. I know you can at least manage the façade of a man."

"Which is it you want? You came for me because you wanted the beast to handle this, did you not? And now you tell me I need to be something else." Dimitri spat. The anticipation of what he'd find on the other side of that door was making it difficult for him to keep the acid from his tongue.

"You know what? I should have kno-"

"Felix just leave it. You know what we mean, right Dimitri?" Sylvain asked pointedly, looking at him with purpose.

"I understand perfectly," he growled.

"Food will be brought up and delivered through the slat at the bottom of the door. Though, lately she's been refusing to eat… See if you can get her to try. Hang this outside the window when you think she's recovered or close to it, we'll send someone up." He handed Dimitri a length of long blue cloth before continuing on. "Otherwise you should have privacy. The guards will remain at the bottom, they won't move from their post unless there's danger or they see your sign."

Sylain rambled it all at him as if in a hurry. Dimitri couldn't really fault him for wanting to be clear of this place as soon as possible. What they were doing - what _HE_ was about to do was as unforgivable as it was necessary, making it all the more ironic. But what in his life _hadn't_ been a massive joke at his expense?

"Is that all?" he muttered, staring at the door, having had enough of Sylvain's concern and Felix's disgust.

"Give her one drop of this once a day. Manuela said it would prevent her from getting… Yeah - Anyway, just once day. Before or after, shouldn't matter."

Dimitri eyed the little vial he'd been handed while the other two men hesitated a moment until Sylvain finally reached over and unlocked the many bolts that held the door shut. Dimitri walked through without hesitation. There was no point in delaying this further.

"Good luck," Sylvain called weakly before shutting the door behind him. Dimitri heard the clicks of the locks as he turned to face the scene before him.

The room was fairly sparse. There was a decent sized bed up against the far wall, a small table and chairs, a fireplace with no fire burning in it to his right, and three narrow and open windows spread evenly along the walls. There was little light illuminating the space now that the sun was setting, and the orange glow could only trickle through two of the windows. But he spotted her soon enough.

She was bracing herself on one of the posts of the bed. Her whole frame shook. Sweat glistened on her skin in the pink-orange light, plastering strands of her pale green hair to her forehead and neck. She was wearing a loose-fitting shift, but it was torn in several places, hanging loose and he could see… Goddess, he could see practically everything, but she didn't seem to care, or maybe she hadn't even noticed. Her eyes were fixed, steady and unblinking on him.

"Of course, its you," it came out like a whimper. A sound he'd never expected to hear from her, ever. She was unbreakable, their Professor.

"I'm afraid so, Professor."

"This is too cruel…"

"I'm sorry. I know this is not -"

"You don't know anything!" Even after everything, even knowing what he knew about what had happened to her; hearing her raise her voice off of the battlefield still made him flinch.

She was approaching him now. Slower than he would have expected. He'd heard of what happened to those who were exposed to this particularly potent spore.

In small doses it behaved like a mild aphrodisiac. Harmless. And it only took effect for an hour or two at most. Longer term exposure, however, could become rather deadly. The victim exposed to the spores would essentially become poisoned the longer they were exposed, unless the hormones and pheromones released during sex were present to combat the toxin…

That the Empire had stooped to such underhanded methods, to such depravity - it shocked even him. He'd thought the Emperor held at least some lingering respect for the Professor. Enough to rule out tactics such as these while seeking her bloody victory. Clearly no depths were too low for her to stoop.

"It's not fair," she breathed as she drew within reach, her arms extended towards him, trembling fingers hooking into the dark fabric of his shirt and holding on tightly. "It's not fair, it's not fair," she repeated over and over.

He'd forgone armor today, knowing it would not be needed at his destination, so there was nothing blocking the heat that was radiating from her body from permeating his. She was so warm… He reached up to check her forehead for fever out of habit, and froze as she closed her eyes, leaning into his hand, humming out a sound almost akin to a purr.

How long had he wanted her to react in just such a way to his touch? How many years had he wanted her in his arms? But not like this. Not when she didn't know what she was doing - what was being done to her…

"I need you and it's not fair," she continued to mutter, and he couldn't tell whether her words were directed at him or herself. She started to pull at his shirt. He could hear fabric tearing.

For once, he was able to keep his wild, depraved self at bay, though it roared at the edges of his control. It didn't care what state her mind was in. It wanted her. "I know you do," he breathed. He flexed his hands, unsure of what he was supposed to be doing.

He wanted to touch her, hold her, kiss her… All the things that had played out in his mind for years, moments he'd thought would be forever lost to him when she fell into that chasm and disappeared for five years. Now here she was in the flesh, and so warm…

"Why won't you touch me?" she whined as his shirt was torn away and her hands went roving over the planes of his chest, his abdomen - anywhere and everywhere she could reach. Dimitri's breath hitched as she pressed herself even closer. He'd been hard since he'd set eyes on her gorgeously disheveled form, and now she too would be aware of that fact. "They sent others to me; did you know? I broke them all… Can't break you though."

Her hands had slipped under the band of his trousers. She'd already unbuckled and removed his belt when he wasn't paying attention. "I'm sorry…" he muttered again half-heartedly.

Byleth made a frustrated sound, grinding her hips into his as she pulled her gaze up to his face. "Stop apologising and touch me. Please, Dimitri."

Why _was_ he holding back? He knew what had to be done. Why it had to be done. And yet still, now of all times, he hesitated. If he didn't do this he really would lose her forever…

"I'm sorry."

"I said sto-" He stopped her words with his lips. Maybe if they didn't speak he could make it through this. His strategy seemed to work, the kiss encompassing their full attention for a while.

Goddess, she felt good. But feeling good also felt wrong. He shouldn't enjoy this, shouldn't savour this. But he'd never stopped wanting her… Even after all the time that had passed, all the things that had been done to him - that he'd done in her absence.

This was wrong, but he would do it… for her. She wouldn't remember. He had to believe she wouldn't. How else could they move on after this?

He let her maneuver them both to the bed. Let her pull off, or rather shred what was left of his clothes. She pushed him backwards with surprising force and ease. Had she really always been this strong? Had she been holding back?

He tried not to get too excited when she angled her hips over his, pressed her pulsing sex down onto his cock. But she hesitated. A look of clarity breaking through the glassy look in her eyes. Was she really as forgone as they had said?

"Dimitri," she uttered his name like a plea and he almost broke.

"Do it. Take what you need." He tried to sound gentle, encouraging, but years of living the life of an animal did not make it easy. His voice was nothing but the sound of stone, metal and glass scraping together.

It was enough in the end, as moments later she was sinking down over him, taking all of him. All of his self control and strength were useless now. She was all there was. She was everything. He took a moment to take in the sight of her moving over him, tremors rippling through her body, her eyes closed, her face overcome with a mix of relief and pleasure.

It was so bittersweet it hurt. He'd so longed to see that look upon her face, a look just for him. To see it now was both glorious and horrifying. The familiar pull of self-loathing began to creep at the corners of his mind. He pushed it aside, focusing on her. He was here for _her_. He would do whatever she wanted, be whatever she needed.

As if reading his mind, she leaned over him, pressing as sloppy kiss to his lips. Her hands tangled up into his hair, holding him close. "Mmm, Dimitri," she purred into his ear and he thought he might lose himself then and there. "I want… I want you to _fuck_ me, Dimitri. Please…"

He circled his arms around her small frame, holding her against him tightly so he could thrust into her with some leverage. The sounds she made when he did told him everything he needed to know.

He was not particularly experienced in this area, but he knew the basics and he was observant. Every little sound she made, the way she wriggled against him when he plunged into her at just the right angle - he took note of it all. At first it was an analytical exercise, or at least that’s what he tried to tell himself. But he _wanted_ to kiss her so hard she was gasping when they parted. He _wanted_ to cup her breasts, feel their soft weight in his palms, tease her nipples until she squealed. He _enjoyed_ watching her expression change as he picked up his pace, pulling her closer and closer to the brink of climax.

He loved it all, but he didn't want to enjoy this.

When her hand clamped down over his bicep, he knew she was close. Her hold on him was like a vice. If he'd been any other man she probably would have broken the bone. As it was, he'd definitely bruise but that was nothing. He barely even registered the pain. How could he when he was watching her come undone before him.

He slowed when he felt the slick muscles of her sex clenching around his cock. Her breathing was more ragged than ever, even as she chanted his name over and over like a prayer. When she came it was like her body was not enough to contain the pleasure, like she was literally bursting at the seems. Something snapped in his mind.

The feral side that had kept him alive for five years surged to the foreground, taking over. It knew how to take pleasure regardless of the situation. It knew how to ignore all the unpleasant and wretched feelings that plagued him. It knew what it wanted, and it wanted her, to be buried inside her, to make her squirm.

As she was still coming down, he flipped them around, hooking her legs over his arms and folding them up to her shoulders. She only looked up at him, half dreamily, half ecstatic that he was finally taking some initiative. Dimitri plunged into her roughly, catching her lips and delving his tongue into her mouth forcefully. He'd take her in every way possible, every way she wanted.

It almost didn't matter now. Exactly how this happened or what happened after. They were here now. He was inside her now. And she was coming again, biting down on his lip as she did. He could smell the coppery scent of blood in the air, and saw it staining her lips as they came away, and then the beast in him was losing control.

He kissed her hard as he came inside her, as her channel still twitched around him, milking his cock as they both came apart. Byleth had her legs hooked tightly around his waist so he couldn't pull away even if he'd wanted to. And he didn't want to. He wished he could stay in her embrace forever, forgetting who and what they were. Existing only for each other.

After a short moment of relative stillness, she started to wriggle beneath him again, grinding her hips up into his. His cock twitched in response, but he needed to get that concoction Sylvain had given him.

She whined as he pulled away from her, and he had to pry her hands from his arms where they were clamped down, biting into his skin. He tried to soothe her, massaging her wrists where he held her at bay gently, pressing soft kisses to her temple or along her jaw.

"Will you wait for me, beloved?" he whispered against her neck. "I'll return in a moment, I promise."

"I can't." She shuddered as if in pain when he removed himself from her and he almost decided to remain with her. But a child resulting from this sordid union would not make the situation any easier to bear. "Don't, Dimitri."

"I'll come back in just a moment. I have nowhere else to be. And you can be strong, I know you can."

Byleth's frame relaxed, and he rewarded her with one last kiss on the lips before getting to his feet to find the vial buried where she'd discarded his clothes moments ago. He took a little more time than was necessary, even though he knew making her wait was causing her distress. He puzzled over why that endearment had slipped out. Why now?

He'd said it hundreds of times in his head, but it had always felt like he had no right to say the word aloud. Perhaps there was some freedom in saying it now, knowing she wouldn’t remember. It made him feel like a coward. But like so many other things that had passed between them, it was too late to take anything back.

By the time he climbed back onto the bed he was hard again. Seeing her splayed out on the sheets waiting for him, chest heaving in anticipation, and what was left of her garment clinging loosely to her form… He almost forgot what he meant to do. "You need to take this, Byleth. Just a drop."

She looked at him with a frown, drawing herself up to her knees and immediately reaching for his now throbbing erection. He was still sensitive after what had just transpired between them and her gentle, but aggressive touch sent a rush of air hissing out of his lungs. He caught her wrist with one hand and attempted to keep her focused on what he was saying. "Just a drop. Then we can do whatever you like."

Byleth opened her mouth for him almost immediately, quickly realising the shortest path to what she wanted was to do as he asked. He tipped the vial over her tongue, allowing a single drop to fall before stoppering it once more and setting it aside. She crinkled her nose at the taste, but forgot it soon enough, as she was climbing into his lap and impaling herself upon his cock once more.

She still radiated heat as though she had been set aflame. It melted into him, until he almost felt as though he were being infected by the same wretched toxins that were threatening to kill her, forcing her to crave carnal satisfaction. Perhaps he was just looking for an easy way out, an excuse for what he was feeling in spite of everything.

He pushed it aside. He had to keep pushing it aside or it would eat him alive.

Byleth seemed to notice something was wrong, even through the fog of lust. Some of the fire had been doused and all her movements slowed, though she did not stop entirely. "You don’t want this, I know," she whispered, burying her face into his neck so he could no longer read her expression.

"Do _you_?" he asked, rather than answer the question. _Could_ she even answer the question in this state? Despite his hesitation to say what he truly felt, his arms tightened involuntarily around her. He had the strange sense that she was about to slip away from him. "Do you really want to know what I'm thinking? Would you remember after all this? Would you even remember it tomorrow?"

"I - I don’t know. Sometimes I think I'm forgetting who I am. There's just fire and want, and a need so strong it hurts." She shifted over him for emphasis, but she looked almost frightened as she spoke. "And then they brought you to me and I remembered you - I remembered myself? But now I - now we…"

Dimitri caught her words with a kiss, willing her to be still. She spoke of things he could not face. Not yet.

She sighed against his mouth and didn't fight the distraction he forced upon her. He was grateful for it. As much as he wanted this, wanted her, he was not ready to face the truth, and he knew he didn't deserve to.

_I am but a vessel, here to serve a purpose… to bring her back. When that is done, I must go back to them. This was never meant to be…_

He didn't dwell on the fact that since he'd entered the tower the call of the dead had dwindled to a dull hum, that he had not seen one dead face looming over her shoulder or watching them from the corners of the room. He did not think on whether their absence meant he should feel relief or guilt…

He did not think… He just let his body serve hers as he'd always wished to.

* * *

They did not stop for hours and when they finally did come to rest, he was shocked at how thoroughly and utterly spent he was. He'd not felt so fatigued in a long time, but Byleth was demanding, and her lowered inhibitions coupled with her unexpected strength made it difficult for even Dimitri to resist.

Even she had her limits, though. Dimitri had no concrete idea how long she'd been kept here, or for how long she'd been either refusing or forgetting to eat. He suspected at the rate her body was burning energy she would not be able to keep up this pace if she did not eat. Something for him to tackle tomorrow…

He almost laughed at the change he had undergone in a mere matter of hours. All it took was being locked in a room with her for him to change - not completely, but right now he was not the barking, revenge obsessed creature she had found in the monastery the day the darkness had spat her back out… not entirely anyway. He didn't know if he wanted to return to that man either, but neither was he certain that he had much of a choice.

If she didn't remember any of this, they would return to the way things were.

If she did remember she would want nothing to do with him.

There were only two options, and both left him feeling empty, void of even the drive for justice that had fueled him these past five years. He should have refused… There had to have been someone else for her, someone better.

How was he supposed to give her up now?

* * *

The first time he woke unexpectedly that night he was shocked awake by a nightmare. It had been so vivid he could feel the rough hempen rope around his neck. His right eye, or the space where it had once been throbbed. It felt as raw and bloody as the day it had been ripped from the socket…

He could hear Cornelia cackling in anticipation, ready to witness the rope draw tight, the floor fall out from under him, and his body twitch and struggle as the life was strangled out of him.

He shot up from the bed with a gasp, straining for air despite there being no obstruction. He thought he might have cried out, but he couldn't be sure if it was part of the dream. His heart rattled away in his chest. The urge to take up his lance and fight his way out of the tower, back to Fhirdiad to take that vile woman's head coiled in his gut, drawing his whole body taught.

Still half conscious of where he was, what he was here for he held himself just barely in check. But it was too late. He'd woken Byleth.

He froze as she sat up, eyes still bleary with sleep. The haze of lust still clung to her, but she seemed preoccupied with him, _his_ fear. She ran her hands delicately up from his shoulders to his neck, soothing every place they touched as she went. They came to rest cupping his face, holding him so he could focus on her eyes. "You're here with me, remember? It's just you and I."

Dimitri was still too disturbed by the dream, and now too confused by her actions to respond. "You don't have to go back there," she whispered against his lips.

"Would that you could keep me here, but I'm afraid that cannot be, beloved." He raised a hand to her cheek. It was almost as though she were herself now, but he dared not believe. "We'll have to leave this place eventually and return to what we were."

"We don't…"

"We do, beloved."

"Then just be with me for now."

He answered her by catching her lips with his, pulling her close. He held her as though he were afraid she'd turn to smoke in his arms, that she'd fade from reality like his ghosts so often did.

His fears were not realized, thankfully. They simply laid there, melting into each other until sleep carried them both quietly and gently into the dark.

* * *

The second time he was awakened unexpectedly it was light enough to be considered very early morning and Byleth's mouth was around his cock. The realization shocked him into wakefulness in record time. His hand instantly went to rest on her head, fingers tangling in her tousled hair. Her eyes looked up at him with wanton delight as she worked him expertly with her mouth.

Where she'd learned all this, he almost didn't want to know… But then, he supposed, they'd both lived lives the other hardly knew anything about. Their time together had been so short, and he'd squandered what time they did have before it all fell to ruin… If only the boy he was back then hadn't been such a coward… so blind…

Abruptly he pulled her off, ignoring her protests as he maneuvered them so she was face down on the sheets, ass in the air as he knelt behind her. She was wet and ready for him as he pushed into her and all protests swiftly turned to cries of ecstasy. Any hesitancy he'd experienced from the day before seemed to be gone as well. He'd accepted his fate, such as it was.

Looping an arm around her he pulled her up so her back was flush against his chest. His hand cupped her breast, working her nipple with his thumb until she could barely pant his name. His other hand slipped around her waist to stroke between her folds - searching… And then he found it, the little bud that would send her reeling.

A rumble of satisfaction reverberated where his lips were pressed to her pulse as her back arched, and her body vibrated as she came for him. While she was still experiencing the shockwaves of her climax, he set her back down, removing his still erect cock from her quivering channel as he lowered his face down to her dripping entrance.

Before she even seemed to realize he'd moved, his tongue flicked out, lapping at her plump mound, drawing a strained sound from her lips. He'd wanted to do this for a shamefully long time, and though he couldn't taste her, it was every bit as delightful as he'd thought it would be. Watching her squirm and writhe as his tongue worked her into yet another frenzy… He knew even now it was an image he'd cherish long after their time in the tower was over.

Pride consumed him as she came for him again, crying out so loud he was certain the guards below could hear her. He came away, licking his lips, and moving over her so his cock was just inches away from her face. She looked up at him, eyes glassy with lusty satisfaction, the odd tremor still rippling through her body.

"This is what you want, isn't it, sweet Professor?" he taunted as his cock bobbed over her, just barely grazing her lips.

She didn't respond with words. She simply opened her mouth and went about finishing what she'd started when she woke him up. Her tongue was too clever by half; the way she used it now to work him into a frenzy just as he had done for her only moments ago. He had thought he would be able to hold out longer, but it was not long before he was spilling himself down her throat.

She took it all greedily, licking her lips as he drew himself away. It was Dimitri's turn to stare down at her, dumbstruck and blissed out of his mind. The line between who was in control and who was not was beginning to blur. Or perhaps he'd simply always been this consumed by her and all it took was one taste for him to lose himself completely.

As he slumped down next to her she raised herself up, moving over him, straddling him. She started to grind her hips into his and his cock responded almost immediately. She bit her lip as she took him inside herself once again, ignoring or oblivious of the scrutinizing way he was looking up at her.

She looked like she'd lost weight over night and she still burned; her skin hot to the touch.

"You're skinny," he grit out as she moved over him. "You need to eat."

"I don't," she protested as her hands clawed at his chest. "I only need this - need you."

"You _need_ to eat, Byleth. Or there will be no more of this. You won't have the strength." She made a frustrated sound before shutting him up with a kiss. He bucked his hips up into her, causing her to rear up with a gasp. His arms held her pressed against him and he could feel her ribcage and the bones of her spine jutting out. Could she really have changed so much over night? After all this, would he lose her anyway?

They fucked until she was spent, and he was very nearly exhausted himself. He left her slumbering on the bed, pulled on his trousers and went to the door where there was a tray of food waiting for him with an assortment of fruits, cured meats, cheese and bread, as well as a pitcher of fresh water. The portion was rather impressive considering the war-torn state of things and the fact that they were in the middle of nowhere.

He took the tray inside, making as much noise as he could in the stairwell beyond the door, and replaced it with a note asking for fresh linens, firewood, and bath water. He'd spotted a copper tub in the corner of the room and they should be able to fit a pale of water through the hatch. While he'd been quite used to living like an animal, that didn't mean she had to… And besides they both needed it after what they'd been up to - would continue to get up to. With any luck the guards would check the door again soon.

Setting the tray down at the end of the bed, he took a seat and picked at the food while he watched her sleep. He tried to ignore the pangs in his chest, the way his gut twisted. It didn't take long for her to wake again, he knew, but it felt like an eternity.

She smiled when she set eyes on him and his heart twisted yet again. "Come eat something," he said trying to ignore the look in her eyes and her tantalizing form, her naked scarred skin, full breasts, or the slickness between her thighs. She crawled on all fours to him and he thanked the Goddess for the fact that he still had his trousers on, at least for the moment.

Byleth reached a hand out to stroke his cheek before her lips crashed into his. He kissed her back only briefly before pulling away and pressing a piece of apple to her lips. "Eat it."

She drew back with a scowl. He'd never thought to see her looking petulant. It was a completely foreign expression on her face but surprisingly endearing. He had to ignore it and suppress the amused smile that threatened to turn up the corners of his mouth. "I'd rather be doing something else with my mouth," she replied suggestively as her hand slid up his thigh.

He caught her before she could reach her goal and guided her back to the tray. "After you eat something, beloved."

There was a flash in her eyes when he used the endearment again, gone so quickly he almost thought he'd imagined it. She popped the piece of apple he'd offered into her mouth and ate it hurriedly. Before she could go for him again, he handed her a piece of bread and cheese. "More."

"Why?"

"You know why, Byleth." Her frown deepened. "Eat some of everything, finish a cup of water, and I'll give you whatever you want."

Bribing her felt wrong but he could think of no other way to get her to eat beyond literally forcing the food down her throat. Luckily it would not come to that. Byleth did as he asked without complaint, and even ate a little more than what he'd suggested. When she'd done everything he'd asked and taken another drop of the concoction he removed the tray from the bed and she immediately climbed back into his lap.

"Thank you, Byleth," he breathed as his arms encircled her. The feeling of relief far stronger than he'd thought it would be.

* * *

They remained entangled with each other for the rest of the day, until the light beyond the narrow windows gave way to the dark. Dimitri slipped reluctantly from her embrace when he heard a sound at the door. Byleth was dozing off again so there was no need for him to make excuses.

He pulled on his rumpled clothes and made it to the door just as he heard a soft knock.

"We've the things you asked for," an unfamiliar voice called from the other side. Even muffled through the door, Dimitri could hear how uncomfortable or embarrassed they were.

They exchanged the items in awkward silence - some of which must have been brought from the monastery; sheets and spare clothes, a cake of soap. Dimitri was thankful they couldn't look each other in the eye. The creature he'd claimed to have been when Byleth found him would have balked at any attempt at decency or propriety, but he hadn't been that creature since he'd set foot in the tower… perhaps even before then if he was to be honest with himself…

While Byleth slept he started a fire in the hearth and warmed the water. Keeping his mind busy kept him from thinking of crawling back into bed and letting her have her way with him. Letting her use him like he longed to be used. Not long from now she would no longer need him like this. Likely, she would no longer need him at all. What had he done since she'd found him but snap and bite at his allies, or spur them on into bloody battle?

Just as the self loathing was starting to overwhelm him, he heard her call to him from the bed. She was kneeling at the edge, watching as he brought a pale of hot water over to the large copper basin and poured it in. He took a moment to appreciate the vision before him. The Byleth sharing the tower with him had not cared one whit about spending every minute with him naked. After a day and a half of doing more than just looking he was still struck by how beautiful she was.

"What are you doing?"

"We need to bathe," he replied bluntly. She looked like she disagreed. "Go on." He gestured to the copper basin.

She didn't argue this time, just moved to the basin and slowly sunk into the steaming water. He thought to hand her the cake of soap but instead knelt next to the basin and started lathering it into her back. She leaned into every touch, releasing sighs that quickly started to drive him mad. His cock throbbed, straining against the fabric of his pants.

Abruptly, she turned and tugged at his arm, breaking his focus. "Join me," was all she said.

Dimitri looked from her to the basin. "I'm not sure I'd fit."

"You will," she said frankly, her expression all seriousness but for how dark her eyes had become. She almost looked like her old self.

He looked from her to the basin and back. He might just barely fit but washing up would be a challenge… Rather than think too hard on the subject he shed his clothes and climbed in behind her.

There was more space than he expected but it was still a rather close fit for the two of them. What surprised him more was that she didn’t immediately make a move on him. Though, they had said the effects of the spores would last a few days. Perhaps they were already waning. They had been going at it quite relentlessly since he'd arrived, and his stamina allowed him to keep up with her far longer than any ordinary man would have.

He pondered this as he scrubbed himself down absentmindedly. Byleth had her arm around one of his bent legs, hugging it to herself and resting her head upon his knee while she waited for him to finish. Again, he wondered if she was coming out of the haze of lust. If this was all about to end.

As soon as he stopped scrubbing, she leaned back against him, pulling his arms around her as she did. "I like this," she sighed dreamily.

"Good," he replied, trying not to let the prospect of leaving the tower - leaving her, pollute his thoughts.

Silence drew out as she settled against him and he tried to ignore the fact that his heart was racing, and his body was stiff. He tried to focus on the heat of the water, of her body resting against his, but all he could think of was that this would all be over soon.

"What's wrong?" Byleth asked, reaching back to stroke his cheek. She tilted her head up where it was resting against his chest to look up at him.

"Nothing for you to worry about." He took her hand from his cheek and pressed a kiss to her fingers.

"It doesn’t' seem that way," she protested.

He let out a strained breath, again, wondering whether she would retain any memory of what transpired here. "I told you earlier. Our time here will not last. We must leave here, and soon I think."

"Who says we must?"

"You will. Sooner or later." His voice wavered; almost so slight it was unnoticeable. Dimitri couldn't be sure if she'd picked up on it.

"Why do you keep saying these things?"

"It's happening already," he sighed.

"Stop it."

"I'm sorry."

She frowned at his apology but didn't speak again. He could see the thoughts stirring about in her head, behind her eyes, but he dared not ask her what she thought for fear of his heart breaking. _It's just sex you fool. It doesn't mean anything, and it never did._

But it wasn't to him and that was the problem… He's not sure it ever was just sex to him…

"Touch me, Dimitri." Byleth's voice broke the silence, startling him from his thoughts. She was looking away from him again and her voice sounded a little strange, off some how. "Please."

Her "please" sounded closer to what he had become accustomed to, but still not quite the same. It was enough to make him turn her to face him. He wanted to look in her eyes, but when he did, he found no answers.

Byleth's hands found their way around his neck as she leaned forward to press a kiss to his lips. He leaned away, not yet ready to let his thoughts rest. "Byleth, do you… do you remember?"

"Remember what?"

"Anything. The monastery, the Blue Lions."

"No."

Her answer did not ring completely true to his ears, but he had never been the best judge of what was true. "Do you know me? Do you know what I am?"

"Dimitri," she replied simply.

"What else?"

"You're -" She squirmed in his lap but held his gaze. "You're everything." She caught his lips again, more desperate than before. His hands moved to her hips instinctively. His cock had been hard since the moment she'd leaned back against him. Still he didn't move, still trying to decipher what her brief answers and strange looks could all mean.

When he didn't respond to her actions, she came away just enough to whisper two heartbreaking words against his lips. "My beloved."

And just like that all his storm cloud thoughts were blown away; overcome and overwhelmed by the blazing light and heat that was her, his Byleth. In that moment it didn't matter how much longer they had. All the thoughts and worries that had been plaguing him since he'd arrived fell away.

Without warning he raised them both out of the now lukewarm water. Byleth's legs locked around his waist immediately and somehow, he managed to evacuate the basin without toppling them both over. They didn't make it to the bed, rather he found the nearest wall and pressed her up against the stone, pausing only briefly to line himself up to her entrance.

In the next instant he was sheathed inside her, thrusting into her so fast and hard he thought the tower might topple to the ground. Byleth clung to him with that same inhuman strength that had broken so many others… but not him. She whispered every encouragement, every endearment in his ear but the one he longed to hear. But she _had_ called him beloved…

She screamed his name as she came, clinging to him for dear life. He found his own releases seconds later, crushing her against the wall as he filled her with his seed. As he stood there shuddering against her, she showered his face with kisses and unintelligible whispers. He held her there until he was ready to take her again.

The second time was even more vigorous than the first. He actually did think he could feel the old stones shaking down to their foundations. Aware enough that leveling the tower would be less than ideal he pulled them away from the wall to one of the chairs and sat them down, balancing her in his lap. She rode him like that until the light trickling through the windows was gone completely and the fire in the hearth was nothing but embers.

Dimitri managed to slow things down enough to convince her to eat, which she did while he changed the bedsheets and attempted to clean some of the mess they had made. She watched him intently as he moved about the room but remained silent. She simply pecked at the food, and when he finished with his tidying, she watched him eat in silence.

When it was clear they were both finished she took his hand and pulled him to the freshly made bed.

Every movement and caress was now tender and soft. He told himself they were both tired. Even the considerable strength of their individual crests had their limits. She fell asleep draped over his chest, and he lay there awake for what seemed like ages contemplating whether he should go hang the signal flag Sylvain had given him from the window.

In the end he stayed there with her and let the steady sound of her breathing lull him to sleep.

* * *

The following day was much like the last but for the pace they set. They moved slow, their actions methodical, exploratory, and almost reverent. It was like they were trying to slow time, memorize every inch of each other before it was all over. They spoke less than they had since he'd arrived, simply watching each other, a million unspoken words lying behind each other's eyes.

He almost said the words as they lay entwined with each other that night. He'd already called her beloved and she him, and yet it didn't seem like enough…

On that final night he stayed awake until she fell asleep, a strange mixture of relief and dread keeping him from slumber. When he was certain she would not rouse, he left the bed they'd shared for just a few days, pulled on his rumpled and partially ruined clothes, and went to hang the yard of blue cloth that would serve as his signal from the window.

It took surprisingly little time for someone to come up to the door to confirm. They sent for Manuela immediately and he was left to watch her sleep in weighted silence. His only company his own dark thoughts and the spirits of the dead which he could hear wailing from beyond the walls. Even they knew his time here was at an end.

When Manuela arrived, she drilled him about everything. How did he know she was better? When did he first notice the change? What symptoms was she still exhibiting?

He answered them all in a daze. His voice monotonous and cold. All he wanted was to leave this behind, move on as he must. The dead were calling…

When Manuela was finally satisfied, he stormed out of the tower as fast as he could go without breaking into a sprint. Sylvain and Felix were waiting at the bottom with a mount for him. He didn't say a word to them or they to him. He simply road off towards the monastery, towards the welcoming cries of the dead.


	2. The Tower - Upright

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Byleth and Dimitri struggle with the aftermath of their time together in the tower.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Some more whumps/angst before the smut returns (there's even a bit of fluff kinda?).
> 
> It takes them a while to sort things out...
> 
> This chapter has both Byleth and Dimitri POV :)

Accident or damage, Catastrophe, Destruction, Renovation, Unexpected Change, Liberation  


* * *

When they told her what had happened and who had been there in the tower with her she almost couldn't believe it. It wasn't simply that she would not have expected him to help, but the manner in which he would have had to have helped her… It just made the whole notion seem impossible…

And yet several of her allies confirmed it, including Seteth, and she was still standing before them today. Alive and well, such as it was. She remembered enough about her time spent as the Empire's prisoner to know what they had done. But she couldn't remember how she'd been freed, how she got to the tower, or when Dimitri had arrived.

As time went on, vague and unclear memories came to her, but it was if she were looking back at them through a fog, or underwater - everything was always obscured. Even with that being the case, however, she still remembered more than she let on.

She remembered the heat, the way her body felt like it was burning from the inside out with a need she could not see beyond. She remembered _him_ \- the things he did and said, but then she thought she must be mistaken. He would not have been so sweet and caring, so gentle like the Dimitri in her memories. He would not have been so _passionate_ …

She expected these notions were the lingering effects of the spore’s toxin. Not only had they clouded her every thought at the time, but they now obscured her memories as well.

Since her return to the monastery, Dimitri had avoided her like the plague. His mood seemed even darker than before this all happened. He rarely left the cathedral, remaining there standing over the rubble at all hours of the day or night unless they had a mission or someone - not her - managed to drag him away for a war council.

At first she had tried to talk to him but he refused to say more than "go away" or "leave me alone" and so she thought that whatever she had done or said while intoxicated by the spores, regardless of what her own untrustworthy memories told her, had been torture for him. She may not have been able to control it but that didn’t excuse what he'd been made to do.

The whole situation was humiliating. Everyone who knew had been exceedingly kind, and she knew they did not judge her for any it, she could see that. But it was like they pitied her now. They stepped on eggshells around her and everyone else who didn't know what had transpired was left in this awkward in-between state, wondering if they should ask what was wrong or leave it alone.

It became so maddening she'd taken to spending most of her down time alone. It wasn't exactly ideal, especially after everything that happened, but she found she vastly preferred solitude over coddling and pity.

* * *

Time continued to flow, and eventually the air of apprehension that seemed to have followed her wherever she went faded along with it. There were far greater things at stake after all.

While Byleth was able to find some semblance of normalcy, Dimitri seemed to be retreating further and further within himself. No matter what she or anyone else tried, they could not seem to reach him.

Then Ailell came and went and it was like the fires of that infernal field of ruin fueled the ones that burned within him, calling for justice for the dead. Somehow, with the vengeance he sought so much nearer to being realised than it had ever been, he seemed to lose himself all the more.

Byleth watched him come apart at the seems from afar. Feeling powerless to do anything, but unable to turn away. At least if she could watch over him, she could keep him from any physical harm, or so she'd thought…

Discovering Dedue to be alive and well changed things, and for the first time in a long time Byleth had some hope for her tortured, broken Prince. But the Battle of Gronder was on the horizon. A sordid caricature of the battle from their school days - this time with much higher stakes, and far bloodier consequences.

She had thought she was paying attention. She thought she'd taken note of all the possible turns and swerves the battle could take. Everyone was already falling back. She hadn't expected that girl to appear out of nowhere and cut him down. She hadn't expected Rodrigue to be the first to step between Dimitri and the killing blow…

How could she have been so incompetent, so reckless and blind? She couldn't even spin back the hands of time by that point. Her well of energy had long since run dry earlier in the battle, trying to see to it that the rest of her friends and companions came home alive. She'd almost lost him, and he _HAD_ lost a man as dear to him as his own father.

She was not surprised to see Dimitri attempting to leave for Adrestia on his own not long after they'd returned to the monastery. She _was_ surprised however, when he stopped in his tracks when she called to him. When he spoke more than a handful of words to her. When he listened to her plea for him to remain, to keep fighting for what he believed in.

She had not thought her words would reach him, let alone have the chance to be heard. But something changed as they stood there in the rain. Just a small thing, but significant none the less. It could have been something in his voice, or the way he finally seemed able to rest his gaze upon her once more. It had been weeks since he'd looked her in the eye. Now that he finally did, she didn't know what to do.

They stood there, growing cold and wet and not saying anything for an excruciatingly long time before he finally thanked her for opening his eyes. He turned to head back inside, but paused a few steps away, his back to her. He shook his head at she knew not what. She thought he would finally tell her what was wrong, why he couldn't be around her for more than a few minutes at a time.

But he just thanked her again and continued on his way, and Byleth was too much of a coward to ask him herself what it was that made him keep fleeing the sight of her.

* * *

Fhirdiad was theirs and Dimitri was… he was happy. Finally, after so much darkness and pain he was smiling. But never did that smile turn upon her.

When he looked at her, the corners of his mouth curved upwards, his voice as he spoke was gentle and warm, but his eyes reflected only sadness. He had thanked her enthusiastically, clasped her hands tightly in his and told her how he wouldn’t have made it to this point if not for her, but his eyes always regarded her with an undertone of sorrow. Byleth told herself it was a small price to pay to see him happy at all, to see him start to finally thrive with his friends and countrymen. Even if it meant she could not be a part of it.

She knew she could easily have the answers she sought if she could just find the courage to be frank and ask him what had happened in the tower, what she had done to drive him away. But she feared the answer as much as she craved it, for it had to have been something terrible for it to affect him so… And she didn't know if she'd be able to live with the full knowledge of what she'd done to hurt him.

She couldn't believe what a coward she had become…

But it was something about what she actually did remember of the tower in contrast to his behavior now that left her with this exaggerated sense of unease. What she could recall she didn't find unpleasant, far from it in fact, and by now she had remembered far more than she had ever expected to. Manuela had warned that most people affected by the spores recalled next to nothing. This was not so for her, or at least she didn't think it was.

But the warmth and affection she recalled contrasted so vastly with the reality she now lived with that she decided she simply could not trust her own memories. " _Beloved_ " he had called her… or was that just one of her imaginings? Perhaps it was the toxins, or a subconscious coping mechanism warping these visions into something more palatable, something any normal person could perhaps live with.

Either way, it changed nothing. He wanted little to do with her, and she didn't want to cause him any more discomfort or pain than he'd already suffered.

* * *

They had won. Despite all the odds, in the face of every hardship they were victorious. Dimitri's heart had never felt so full of joy.

The only damper on his mood was watching Byleth standing apart from everyone, watching the festivities but not partaking. After Edelgard had fallen and she'd guided him out of her throne room in silence, he had not seen or heard from her again until they were back at the monastery. But then he wasn't sure what he'd expected.

He was the one that had kept her at arms length since the events at the tower. Eventually she had stopped trying to reach out to him and he'd thought he would find some sense of relief, but that feeling never came. He still yearned to be near her.

But then he recalled the days immediately after they'd left the tower. How she'd avoided everyone, how run down she had looked, how none of that had ever really completely faded away. The thought that she had remembered everything or even fragment, that she couldn't be near him without being reminded - it never left him.

He knew he was being ridiculous, but he couldn't help himself. It was a shame he was certain he'd carry with him for the rest of his life.

And yet…

The celebratory festivities were still well underway. Most people were gathered in either the Great Hall or the Dining Hall, but there were several revelers milling about all areas of the monastery grounds. His feet carried him past all of them towards the cathedral, through the rows of pews and back out one of the side doors towards the Goddess Tower.

He was not surprised to find her there alone, but the sight of her still made his chest tighten and his heart race. Memory of his careless promise to her came rushing back to him. Why had he called it a joke? Why had he tried to retreat from his own words?

He was a coward then, just as he was a coward now. Nothing had changed.

He wanted to go to her. Tell her everything. Let her tell him to his face that she wanted nothing to do with him. At least then he'd have closure. His suspicions would be confirmed, and he could move on. He _had_ to move on…

Before he could make a move someone else appeared from the shadows along the walkway and approached her. Seteth had a concerned look upon his face, one Dimitri could empathise with all too well.

"Done with celebrating already?" the advisor, now soon to be Archbishop, called to her when he was a few feet away.

"I think so. I seem to be quite worn out lately." Byleth turned to him with a weak smile.

"You've worked hard. This victory was in no small part thanks to you. If you would rather rest than celebrate, I don’t think anyone would fault you for it." Seteth paused a moment before continuing. "Though I confess I am a bit concerned. I feel I'm often finding you alone these days."

"I'm fine, Seteth. There's been so much going on. It's easier to keep my head clear when I'm alone." There was nothing particularly off about what she said, but her words still didn't quite ring true.

"I won't pester you further about it, but you know you can come to me if you need anything, Byleth. Whatever it is."

"I know, and thank you, Seteth; for everything. I was going to wait until tomorrow to tell you, actually. About remaining here at monastery… I think I will, but I need to go away for a while."

_I should leave. This conversation has nothing to do with me._

Seteth crossed his arms over his chest, his stance becoming slightly agitated. "If that is what you wish, then you have my full support, but… Are you sure about this course of action? I know you do not want what Rhea intended for you, and if I'm being honest, I don't think I can fault you for it after everything that has happened. But going off on your own…"

"I won't be alone. Some of the men from my father's company have been in touch. I'll be with them for a time, until I'm ready to return. We leave tomorrow morning."

"So soon?" Seteth sounded as shocked as Dimitri felt. Was she running away?

"I think it’s for the best."

Seteth was silent for a time before he spoke again. "You will be missed, Professor. Please stay in touch. Send word that you are alright. You'll have half the monastery and several lords and ladies out hunting for you if you do not, I fear."

"Of course," she smiled then. A real smile like the one that first set his heart aflame. Like the ones she'd graced him with not so long ago, when she didn't know any better…

He turned to leave. He'd intruded on their privacy enough, but he halted in his tracks when he heard his name.

"Will you tell Dimitri for me… Tell him I wish him all the happiness in the world, with all my heart." Her voice wavered as she spoke.

"Are you sure you wouldn't like to tell him yourself?"

"I can't. I just - I can't… Will you do that for me?" She wasn't looking him in the eye now. In fact, she looked ready to bolt.

"Of course, Byleth."

It was as he feared then. She could hardly bear to speak to him…

The following morning, she was already gone. Seteth came to find him looking like he'd rather be anywhere else. He delivered Byleth’s message as promised and Dimitri thought he was about to leave but he lingered at the threshold of his quarters.

"You should speak to each other. Whatever this is, whatever happened, you're hurting yourselves more by avoiding each other like this," Seteth sighed, pinching the bridge of his nose before continuing. "I know you did not ask for my interference or my advice, but I would rather see the two of you happy and well. I worry for you both."

Dimitri's initial reaction was to protest, reject any unsolicited help or advice. But he calmed himself almost immediately. Seteth was right and he knew this. "I thank you for your consideration and your kindness, Seteth. My heart and my gut tell me you are right, but I fear that as much as I want us to be reconciled, it is not what _she_ wants. I would rather be apart from her than cause her any more pain."

"I think you underestimate her fortitude. I fear there is a grave misunderstanding between you two. But the only way to know for certain is for you to speak to one another. I will trouble you not further. I know the time required to heal can be very long indeed, so please do not think I wish to rush you into anything, just… Know that I too wish you the best, Your Majesty." With that Seteth left him in peace, or some facsimile of peace.

Seteth's words were like a storm cloud over his head until the day Dimitri and his party left Garreg Mach to return to the Kingdom. The further he was from the monastery the easier it was to distract himself from her and all the things he'd left unsaid and undone, but she was never really far from his thoughts.

* * *

It wasn't long before word reached her with news from Faerghus, even while she was away traveling Fódlan with her father's mercenary company. She tried to remain calm, neutral even, when they heard of the recovery and restoration efforts. Even when the inevitable gossip began to circulate as people speculated about who their knew king would take for his wife. Some how she managed to keep her face placid - she'd had enough practice at it after all.

Thankfully her travels across Fódlan provided ample distraction most of the time. When Leonie joined them once they made their way into former Alliance territory things became even easier, though he was never entirely forgotten.

She still dreamed of the tower, of _him_. The lines between which memories were real and which were simply manifestations of her own desires continued to blur as time passed. Eventually she stopped caring. The memories or dreams, whatever they may be, were with her still and she had no say in the matter.

Leonie had tried to help her through it as best she could. And it was good to finally have a confidant who would listen to her scrambled thoughts without judgement. She never pressed her or scolded her. She simply listened without judgement.

But as with all things, Byleth's time with her mercenaries drew to an end. It wasn't until she was preparing to return to Garreg Mach that Leonie finally pulled her aside and said her piece.

"I don't want to tell you how to live your life. At this point I think you've earned the right to live free of what anyone else wants," she began, as they road up the steep and winding path to Garreg Mach. "But if I don’t get this off my chest, I think we might both regret it."

"I think I know what you're about to say, but please go ahead," Byleth replied with a half-smile.

"You should speak with him. I don’t care how difficult it is. It's been six months since Enbarr, and even more since they found you in that dungeon. Nearly a year, Byleth."

"I'm aware of how much time has passed," she said, followed by an exaggerated sigh.

"Well, you're bound to cross paths again anyway. Not just because you're returning to the monastery, but… You've just always had an air of destiny clinging to the both of you. That's just how things are for people like you and him. You have destinies," the flame-haired swordswoman said with a smirk.

"Well then surely whatever great destiny fate had in mind for me has been fulfilled by now." Byleth tried keep the frustration from her voice but she knew she failed. Luckily Leonie was impervious to her tendency towards dark moods. She'd seen enough of them by now.

"I doubt it. Fates aside, I don’t think you will ever rest until you find some kind of closure with him. And you'll be punishing yourself like this until your dying day if you don't," Leonie said matter-of-factly, sounding like a disappointed parent.

Byleth had given up on her excuses. The only thing stopping her from reaching out to Dimitri was her own cowardice. Time away and in relative solitude from those who knew her had helped to clear her mind, but it had not made her any more courageous when it came to this particular problem.

"You're living half a life. With or without him you deserve to move on and _live_." Leonie's voice became gentle. They road the rest of the way up the hill and through the gates in silence.

Leonie waited with her while she saw her horse to the stables and unharnessed her bags, then walked with her back to the main gate.

"Will you not stay a while?" Byleth asked, unable to keep some of the apprehension from her voice.

"I have to get going. This place brings back memories, some better than others… And it's not home for me," Leonie replied, her smile tinged with a hint of sadness. “I have my own King to track down, remember?”

"I understand. Thank you for everything, Leonie. Things would have been quite different, I think, if you hadn't found me." Byleth held her hand out to Leonie but her flame-haired friend took it and pulled her into a tight embrace.

"I forget sometimes that you need to be reminded of this, but you are one of the strongest people I've ever met, Professor. There was a reason I've been measuring myself against you and your achievements since the day you arrived here. I'll probably never stop, if I'm honest." As she came away Byleth thought Leonie's eyes had taken on a slightly glassy look. "So, you better not start wallowing. I'll be checking up on you."

"Fine, it’s a deal," Byleth said, a wide open smile finally cracking her dour expression. "Safe travels, Leonie. Tell the boys to be behave."

"They won't have much of a choice!"

With that Leonie turned back to where her horse was waiting for her at the gate. Byleth watched as she road away until she was out of sight. When she turned back to the entrance hall, she caught the gatekeeper watching her; bright eyes, grinning like a madman. She couldn't help but return his smile as she started for the door. "Good day, Professor! Welcome back."

"Thank you. It is good to be home."

* * *

Seteth had been lurking outside her office all morning. At first, she'd just thought he was having an off day. Things still got quite busy around the monastery even without a full-blown war taking up most of their time. Sometimes that meant he was rushing about the monastery, keeping everything in order. Even as the new Archbishop, he liked to take care of as many things as he could himself - regardless of her efforts to try and get him to relinquish at least some of his perceived duties. She had resigned herself to accepting that some of this was just what made Seteth, Seteth.

Today however, it was a little different. There was no reason to be lingering outside her door every few minutes. It was as if he'd been pacing the length of the hall all morning. Eventually she'd had enough, storming out into the hall to catching him mid lap. "What is going on, Seteth? You've passed by my door more than a dozen times since breakfast."

"Forgive me, Byleth. I just - well you see…"

Byleth crossed her arms over her chest like a disappointed parent facing down a misbehaving child.

"I have news, and I've been wondering how to tell you, if I'm to be honest," he said bashfully.

Byleth relaxed, letting her arms fall. "I'm a grown woman, Seteth. I can handle whatever this news is," she said with a reassuring smile.

Seteth let out a sign, and though he too relaxed, his expression gave away that he still doubted his news would be well received. "The King of Faerghus will be visiting the monastery in five days time, with a fairly large entourage as I understand it."

"Ah," was all she could manage as a reply. She had indeed overestimated her preparedness for this news.

"You still have not spoken I take it?" he asked gently.

"No. I just… Things were still quite hectic when I returned, as they must have been for him - for all of them. I haven't written, but I should have." Her weak excuses were enough to make herself cringe.

"He said he wanted to see you. He wrote to me himself to let me know they were coming." Seteth's tone remained gentle, but Byleth couldn't help the wave of anxiety that swept through her.

"I'm - I'm glad then. Truly. A little terrified, but glad none the less." It was the truth. Despite her rioting nerves and violent heartbeat, she _was_ glad. It was time to put an end to whatever this was between them, even if that meant _everything_ between them came to an end as well. Leonie was right. She hadn't been able to move on, to live.

"You needn't be terrified, Byleth. Easier said than done, I know. Talking this through will be beneficial to you both, though, I am certain."

"Wish that I could be as certain as you. Your confidence shall have to do for the both of us." She followed her words up with a nervous laugh.

Seteth gave her a gentle, reassuring smile, one she’d seen him often bestow upon Flayn. "Have faith, Byleth. You know better than anyone else that the Goddess's plans often take us along paths we would never expect. But sometimes those paths lead us to the sweetest gifts we will ever receive in life." He gave her arm a reassuring squeeze before leaving her to mull over what the next few days would bring.

Turning back to her office, Byleth found herself walking over to the wall of shelves rather than to her desk and unfinished paperwork. She reached for a small, intricately engraved box, opened it and pulled out the ring her father had given her as they’d stood over the grave of her mother.

Even after everything, all the hurt and confusion, her heart still called for him. That one precious word had echoed through her mind during both her waking and dreaming hours. He'd called her " _beloved_ " she knew it. She knew it was not a dream, or a warped memory. He'd said it to her while they were locked away in that tower; in their own world for a time. And she'd said it back.

She replaced the ring reverently back into its case and returned to her paperwork. She would be distracted until he arrived, and likely for several days or even weeks afterwards. She knew what she would do - had to do… But she was still uncertain of whether she finally possessed the courage to actually do it.

* * *

They'd been at the monastery for three days already and Dimitri had not seen hide nor hair of Byleth. Seteth had assured him that she intended to meet with him, and that she was in fact, still at the monastery despite how illusive she seemed to be. Indeed, often enough when he went looking for her, he was nearly always told he had just missed her.

When he'd received Seteth's response to his letter about visiting Garreg Mach he'd been hopeful. He'd specifically written of his intention to see her, and Seteth had said she was amenable to a reunion. His heart had nearly beaten its way out of his chest as he read the words.

It had been so long - more than a year since the tower and he'd thought he'd gained a certain measure of composure when it came to this particular matter. But all it took was one tiny glimmer of hope to set his heart and mind racing all over again.

But he'd gotten ahead of himself again. Of course, she needed time. Or she may even have had a change of heart. It was perfectly reasonable, and she was completely within her rights to do so. But he had so hoped…

He was trudging back to his quarters after having missed her yet again, when he noticed the door to his room was slightly ajar. He did not expect any nefarious plots on his life while at the monastery. Things in Fódlan were still rocky, unstable. But Garreg Mach was managing to be a pillar of stability that the rest of the land could look to as an anchor. Regardless, it was prudent to go in on his guard.

As he predicted, it was empty. Since there was no intruder to be found he scanned the room for anything out of place. His eyes quickly settled upon a small wooden box sitting on the writing desk across from the bed. He reached for it hesitantly, uncertain what it could be or what would have prompted someone to leave it for him.

Inside he found a folded piece of parchment and a silver ring with nine sparkling sapphires set in the shape of a star. He frowned, not recognizing the piece before unfolding the little bit of parchment. Only one word was written upon it: " _Beloved_ "

Time seemed to freeze for a moment. He didn't think he was breathing, and he was almost certain his heart had stopped as he stood there reading that one word over and over again. When he finally snapped out of it, he dropped the parchment and shoved the ring and its box into a pocket and sped out of the living quarters, headed straight for the staff offices.

He went for her office first but found it predictably empty. Luckily however, he spotted Seteth in the hallway. He caught the Archbishop's arm and tried to keep his frantic nerves in control as he asked where Byleth was.

"I'm afraid I haven't seen her lately, Your Majesty. Is something the matter?" Seteth asked, clearly able to detect that something was off.

"Nothing is wrong, I just - I must find her, it's urgent," Dimitri stammered.

"You could try asking the gatekeeper. She's taken to leaving the monastery in the afternoons. To clear her head. He'll know if she's about somewhere or if she's left."

"Thank you, Seteth."

Dimitri heard Seteth call after him, but he was already gone. He caught several confused and startled glances as he single-mindedly rushed through the halls to find the gatekeeper.

"Good afternoon, Your Maj -"

"Have you seen Professor Eisner?" Dimitri blurted cutting him off.

"Uh, oh yes. She just road out maybe half an hour ago."

Dimitri barely managed a thank you before he barreled away towards the stables. He knew exactly where she was going.

The ride seemed to take ages. It had been a long time, but he thought he remembered it being so much shorter. When he finally saw the top of the tower peak over the horizon, the beat of his pulse picked up its pace, blood charging through his veins just as his steed charged towards their destination. Hope swelled within him but even now the all too familiar tendrils of fear and doubt kept any elation he might otherwise have felt at bay.

He saw her horse tied to a post outside the tower first, but no sign of Byleth. Unexpected panic struck him at the prospect of having to enter that place filled with so many conflicted memories. As he dismounted, he tried to calm his nerves, breathing slowly in and out. His hands flexed at his sides as though they longed to grasp his lance. But no weapon could defend him against the possible heartbreak that awaited him.

No matter how he turned it over in his mind he still found it difficult to believe; first that she had remembered enough to recall his use of that word. Second, if she did recall that much, that she had forgiven him - that she did not despise him…

As he approached the door at the base of the tower he paused, attempting to muster the fortitude to walk the stairs up to the room they'd shared for that handful of bittersweet days. Just as he was about to step inside, he heard a sound behind him and then a soft, slightly trembling voice. "I wasn't sure you'd actually come."

Dimitri swerved around to find the most beautiful sight before him. Byleth emerged from the outcropping of trees that had overgrown and encroached upon the tower's walls. She looked just the same, unchanged and as dazzlingly exquisite as he remembered. As she moved towards him, he saw the apprehension in her eyes, but she was smiling. It was the same smile he'd seen every night in his dreams since she'd left.

He realized he was holding his breath and slowly began to exhale as she came to stand just a few feet away from him. He waited…

* * *

He actually came. He even knew where to find her. Though she supposed if his memory of their time here was remotely as vivid as hers was then there was no way he could not have known to come here.

They stood there in silence, just staring at each other from a few feet away. Suddenly everything she'd thought she wanted to say didn't seem right. All she wanted to do was tell him she loved him. To leap into his arms so he could hold her like he had back then. She wanted him to kiss her like he _needed_ her, like she was the air he breathed.

But she didn't yet know why he had come. It could simply be that he came to tell her off once and for all. Tell her they both needed to move on. That he couldn't have anything more to do with her.

"You remember." Dimitri spoke first. All Byleth could do was nod. "How much?"

"All of it - well, most of it… I think. Somethings are still fragmented," She stammered shakily. It felt like lightning was coursing through her veins, like she was on the precipice of something and about to topple over headfirst.

"And you don't - you don’t despise me?"

"What? How could I? Why would I? You saved my life."

"You remember the things I said, the things I did. I took advantage -"

"Dimitri don't, please." Bracing herself she took another step forward, watched as Dimitri seemed to resist the urge to either flee in the other direction, or close the distance between them completely. "I know what you did. What we _both_ did."

He hissed out a breath grimacing as he looked anywhere but at her. "You couldn't have known what you were doing."

"But I did. By the end I did. It was strange. For a time, it was like being a passenger in my own body." She had to pause and inhale a shuddering breath before she continued. "It started to feel like a dream almost, like we were living out a fantasy. And then I woke one morning, and you were gone and I thought you must have hated every minute of it. All the gentleness and endearments, you were just being kind. I thought the memories that came to me were just my own imaginings."

"It wasn't kindness it was selfishness," he spat, but she could see his disgust was directed at himself, not her. "I would have done anything to save you, even then, when I was more beast than man. Beastly enough to still want you and enjoy you even though you were out of your mind and only half aware of who I was."

He looked at her finally, eye full of self-loathing and just the tiniest glimmer of something else. Hope maybe. "I've always wanted you, Byleth. I've never stopped wanting you."

"Dimitri," she sighed as she took the final step to close the gap between them and took his hands in hers. "Do you still not understand what I'm trying to tell you?"

"I just don't understand how you can forgive me. You _shouldn't_ forgi-"

Byleth had heard enough. She pulled him to her catching his lips with hers. If words, and rings were not enough to convince him, then perhaps this was. She could feel his body tense for just moment before his arms came around her, holding her tight.

Suddenly it was like she was being swept away by a rogue wave. It was like being locked in the tower with him all over again. She felt the blood in her veins being set aflame, but there were no toxins or spores here to blame for this fire that now consumed her. There was only him.

He leaned in, as if they weren't already close enough despite being pressed into each other, and she lost her footing. Byleth toppled backwards, taking Dimitri with her. The soft mossy ground beneath her cushioned her fall while Dimitri caught himself, braced above her so as not to crush her. He looked down at her with a shocked expression, like he couldn't believe what had just happened.

"I'm sorry! I didn't mean -"

Byleth didn't let him finish. She was well and truly and done with words. If she had to, she would show him. Placing her hands on either side of his face she brought him back down to kiss him once more. He put up little resistance until she started to pull away at his clothing.

"Byleth," he gasped, pulling away from her finally, but he didn't move to stop her. "Are you sure? Out in the open?"

She shifted so he was now pinned beneath her. As she pulled her shirt over her head and tossed it aside, she watched as all trace of uncertainty vanished, as he eye became dark and roamed greedily over her naked torso. "No one comes out here. We're alone, beloved."

Dimitri's eye went wide at her use of the word that had grown to carry so much meaning for the two of them. A second later he was pulling her down gently to kiss her again, slow and purposefully, like he was trying to communicate every single thing that he hadn't been able to say to her until this point. When they came away it was her turn to be left breathless.

He let her help him out of the rest of his things with renewed enthusiasm before switching their positions once again. Kissing a trail down from her lips, along her neck, stopping to lap at each peaked nipple before sinking down lower. He pulled away her shorts but paused at her tights. "Something about these," he muttered more to himself than to her. "They drive me crazy."

"Really?" she asked with sly grin.

"Really," he affirmed as he slid his hand delicately up her thigh. He caught the band of her tights and underthings with his fingers before tearing them down the middle with one quick motion.

  
There was no way he could have any further doubt that she wanted him as he stroked his fingers between her wet folds. She squirmed beneath his touch, loving every moment of this. But she wanted more, she wanted _all_ of him. Then his fingers were replaced by his tongue and she was seeing stars.

She hadn't forgotten what this felt like, what _he_ felt like. Many a night she'd touched herself recalling the things they'd done together when they thought they only had a few brief days together, but what she did on her own to relieve this lust wasn't the same as having him here touching her, devouring her.

As she was coming down from the ecstasy he’d easily inflicted upon her, Dimitri drew himself over her, his lips finding hers in a lusciously deep kiss. He moaned against her mouth as she hooked her legs around his waist. "Byleth," he said it like he was still uncertain, but his hips were already bucking into her, moving to join with hers. She could feel the tip of his cock already parting the folds of her entrance.

She kissed away his unspoken protests. "I need you, Dimitri," she rasped into his ear, and echo from her memories, and with that he was plunging inside her. Until now she had thought the intensity she recalled from their brief time together was largely due to the effect of the toxins, but it was clear to her now. They didn’t need toxins or potions to spur them on, perhaps they never did.

He kissed her like he was never going to let her go again, like he wanted to drink down every sound, every cry of pleasure she made as the walls of her sex tightened around him. She could see him straining for control, but she wanted him to let go, to spill himself inside her. It was a primal need, fueled by the fire that had ignited between them.

How could she ever have thought she could live without him? It seemed ludicrous to even entertain the idea now.

Another wave was building inside, rippling out from her core, and about the crash as Dimitri's pace started to lose its rhythm. He had one hand tangled in her hair while the other reached down to stroke the sensitive bud between her lower lips. Once again, she came apart with hardly any coaxing. As her sex tightened and spasmed around him Dimitri let out a groan against her lips as he filled her with his seed.

They held each other as they trembled through the shockwaves of their synchronized climax. He hadn't stopped kissing her and she was quite content for that to continue indefinitely. She made a small sound of complaint when he eventually did come away, watching her with a bewildered glassy look in his eye.

He moved his hand from where it had been coiled in her hair to tentatively stroke along her cheek, along her jaw - tracing the features of her face like he still couldn't believe she was there before him. "I love you, Byleth - so much. I never should have left you."

"You didn't. I left you, without even saying a word." Tears were spilling from her eyes unbidden at the memory of her own cowardice. How much pain could she have saved the both of them if she has just confessed back then?

"Ah, but I left you first. I was a coward and fled the tower before you even woke. I wonder often how things would have been if I had remained…" His voice cracked. "I thought - I thought I had defiled you."

"Oh, my love," Byleth whispered as she pressed another desperate kiss to his lips before kissing away the tears that now stained his cheeks and mingled with hers.

Her arms tightened around him and soon kisses that were meant to soothe grew hungry - desperate. Dimitri hadn't pulled out of her yet and she could feel his cock becoming hard again inside her. It felt so good, so _right_ having him inside her. A small moan slipped out between kisses and Dimitri instantly bucked his hips into her

The feel of him fucking the seed he'd already spent earlier into her once more came with an unexpected yet intensely delicious sense of satisfaction. Again, it was like a primal part of her was activating. Perhaps the beast in him called to the beast in her.

She grinned against his lips before flipping them both over so she could ride him the way she wanted. Even now he seemed slightly shocked by her enthusiasm. Byleth was patient though. However long it took, she would make sure he had no doubt of how much he meant to her.

Until now she hadn't given much thought to his almost inhuman stamina. She’d recalled it as part of the fever dream, the catalyst that had led them to this moment. It didn't seem out of place while they were locked in that room together with nothing to do but fuck each other's brains out. It was something else to experience it now with more clarity. But then could she really say she was any different now than she was then? Her need for him was insatiable.

Bracing her hands against his broad chest she started to move over him at a quicker pace. Her eyes locked with his, watching his face as she moved over him. She delighted in every minute expression she was able to draw out him as she stroked her hands over his chest, clenched the walls of her sex around his cock, or drew her nails across his skin.

He huffed out a strained breath as his hands came up in retaliation, grasping each breast firmly before pinching her nipples and grinning mischievously up at her as he continued to tease them. She couldn't help the squeal of delight that erupted from her. It was like her blood had been electrified, every nerve ending hypersensitive and aching for his touch. It might've been more frustrating how utterly at his mercy she was, were it not for the fact that she could clearly see Dimitri was just as much beholden to her.

Just as before, their climax built and peaked in unison. Dimitri had taken her by the hips. His fingers gripping her flesh so tightly he was sure to leave marks. The thought of it sent shivers running down the length of her spine as his hands brought her up and down on his cock faster and harder until stars were once again bursting across her vision.

Their mingled cries echoed off the walls of the tower and out into the little empty valley until Dimitri pulled her down to him and captured her mouth with his. His tongue delved between his lips, colliding with hers in a feverish dance as he thrust into her a final few times, filling her with yet more of his seed. There was more than the first time, more of _him_ , so much that she could feel it leaking out of her. And what a decadent feeling it was…

She lay there draped over him as he kissed her endlessly, his lips devouring her like they were the only two people left on the face of the earth, like they would never have to return to the rest of the world. She ignored the fact that she knew they couldn't stay here, that eventually Dimitri's people would send a search party for the king that had only just been returned to them.

But for a few moments more she could pretend they had no responsibilities, no one waiting for them. She could pretend they belonged only to each other…

"Marry me, Byleth," Dimitri whispered against her temple between kisses.

For some reason, even though she was the one that had left a note in a box with a ring for _him_ , his request came as a surprise. She sat up with a start to look him in the eye. "I came to Garreg Mach to ask you, but you beat me to it," he confessed with a bashful grin. "Will you marry me, my beloved?"

"Yes!" she blurted almost before he'd even finished speaking, a wide smile already drawing itself across her lips.

"I never want to be parted from you again." He dusted kisses across her lips, her cheeks her eyelids, and her forehead as he spoke.

"Nor I you, my love." Byleth held onto him tighter now, wishing even more that they could just stay here.

But even if that could not be, the road ahead of her now held promise. The path before her was bright, and she would be walking it with Dimitri at her side. And as she lay there with him, basking in his love and this new promise, she felt truly content and at peace. It was not the strange and borderline unnatural tranquility that had followed her all her life, but true peace, and it was sublime.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> As a bit of an Epilogue...
> 
> Byleth and Dimitri marry, they help both Fódlan and and the church in the aftermath of the war, but eventually hand the reigns of ruling the land over to the people, with Seteth and all their other allies to provide guidance and keep the peace.
> 
> They both deserve rest and happiness, and eventually Byleth does what Rhea did for Jeralt so she can live out her long life together with the one she loves.


End file.
